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Tuesday
Mar062007

Talkers V. Listeners

Even Matlock couldn't pull this one out with a stacked jury.  Listening is a lost art.  People aren't really listening, they're waiting for their turn to talk.  Or they're formulating their talking points while someone else is talking.  People speak at 100 to 175 words a minute (300 if you're Martin Scorsese).  But they can listen at 600 to 800 words a minute.  So, it's already no contest.  The non-listening mode is epidemic.  Watch the McLaughlan Group, Bill O'Reilly or any of the myriad confirmation hearings in Congress.   Opinions and personal agendas rule the day.  The listener is demoted to wall flower status. 

A few years ago I attended a meeting of the Association of Humanistic Psychology.  One of the seminars was led by two eminent therapists. One was charismatic and engaging.  The other was soft spoken and quietly confident.  During the question and answer period, I realized that the "boring" therapist was a master at active listening.  The charismatic therapist was performing.  The demure therapist was actually listening.  Next time you have a meeting, just survey the event.  Who is talking?  Who is really listening?  Who is swimming in their own thoughts?  I highly recommend a road map to active listening. It's a book called  Listen Up: What You've Never Heard About the Other Half of Every Conversation: Mastering the Art of Listening (Paperback) by Larry Barker (Author), Kittie Watson (Author). 

 If that doesn't work, try every teacher's favorite weapon, Listen up, you'll be tested on this tomorrow.

Reader Comments (3)

Thank you for this insightful post.Very well written and spoken!

March 30, 2007 | Unregistered CommenterVinod

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October 2, 2010 | Unregistered Commenterhermes

This is real because People speak at 100 to 175 words a minute, I've heard that people who speaks a lot have high probabilities to learn more, that's the reason I take generic viagra everyday because it makes me talk a lot.m10m

March 9, 2011 | Unregistered Commentercasa

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