Mr. Rogers, Ego and the Neural Tripwire.
Humility and business aren't frequent bedfellows but David Marcum and Steven Smith, authors of Egonomics, have made a compelling case that maybe they should be.
Does your ego help or hurt you in business?
When your identity is continually fused with your ideas -- any perceived threat to your ego turns on your autonomic nervous system and you chemically you begin to hear less and defend more.
Marcum and Smith tell a great story about Fred Rogers (Mr. Roger's Neighborhood) when he appeared before a senate committee to help prevent the cutting of government funding for National Educational Television (PBS) in half. The hearing was chaired by Rhode Island Senator John Pastore.
You can watch the actual testimony below, but here is a portion of the transcript and some telling insight from Marcum and Smith.
Pastore: (Challenging) All right, Rogers, you've got the floor.
Mr. Rogers (Holding a document he was asked to submit) Senator Pastore, this is a philosophical statement and would take about 10 minutes to read, so I'll not do that. One of the first things that a child learns in a healthy family is trust, and I trust what you've said, that you will read this. It's very important to me. I care deeply about children. My first--
Pastore: (Interrupting) Will it make you happier if you read it (Said sarcastically and with a slight condescending tone. (The audience and press nervously laugh).
Marcum and Smith interrupt the story to give the reader a look at the dynamics that affect our interactions. "At this point, Rogers had two things working against him. 1) The surge of his own ego working to 'protect' him and someone else's closed mind. To understand how our ego affects our intensity and intent behind a discussion, let's look at what wold likely be going on inside our head if we were Fred Rogers.
When we are threatened, our response to a threat becomes physiological. Dr. John Gottman calls this escalation of emotion "diffuse physiological arousal (DPA). Dr. Daniel Goleman calls it the "neural tripwire." Among other things. we start secreting adrenaline, chemicals that cause our heart to race up to 30 beats per minute faster, arteries constrict, and perspiration increases. (Essentially the flight or flight response).
"When we're in DPA on the inside -- and acting like we're not on the outside -- things happen in the brain that cause tunnel vision and we can't hear what is being said." DPA literally affects our hearing. The brain reacts and we there is a physiological response to challenges or a perceived attack on ego and identity (values, character, beliefs, our sense of what we consider to be right or wrong etc.)
Let's go back to Rogers and Pastore.
"Consider the timing of Pastore's sarcastic remark to Rogers. Not only was it condescending and filled with excessive ego, (or as I see it a dismissiveness) it was delivered at the very moment Rogers shared what was most important to him." How we manage and channel the intensity of our own internal experience determines whether ego works for or against us.
"The weld between our identity and or ideas is sometimes so tight that we don't separate the two, or we can't separate the two, or we can't separate them easily when questions or perceived threats present themselves."
The key here is that if we can't distinguish who we are from what we do, what we have or who we do it with, we won't see past our titles or tenure in a discussion. If we say to ourselves or others, "I'm the vice president or I'm the CEO ... then we are parading our identity and take the conversation personally."
Let's go back to Rogers.
Rogers: I'd just like talk about it, if that's all right --
Pastore: (interrupting again) All right, sir, Okay.
"Rogers began to discuss the state of television, the role violence plays in television, and how it undermines the the emotional development and health of children. At first, Pastore appears to patronize, acting as if he is listening, but his body language sends a different message But the transformation that occurs is visible. Within minutes, Pastore turns increasingly sincere, asking questions about Roger's program. Despite Pastore's early contempt, Rogers remained devoted to progress." In the intensity of debate, humility helps us from making the debate personal.
My goal as a Creative Director and Innovation consultant has always been to channel intensity from identity to ideas.
I have found that many managers and clients begin to go into the DPA brain mode because they are defending identity. You can see this played out in the body language and attitude of Colin Powell and Donald Rumsfeld in virtually any cabinet meeting of the early Bush years.
My question to readers is how has your experience been in the workplace. Are you identity mode or idea mode? Has the DPA brain heating you up or are you in the moment? I hope you will contribute comments and experiences. (Either from the comment section below or directly to me at inotivity@gmail.com.) I will add my experiences. If you wish to remain anonymous, put that into your message.
Here are Rogers and Pastore.
Creativity Central
4 Comments
Reader Comments (4)
I hadn't heard the "DPA" explanation for what I've always called the conversion reaction. It's the exact process you explain, where mental responses convert to heightened physical states, and you see this sudden shift of gears into anxiety, denial, nervousness, anger, etc. This is painfully common in creative departments where people can't separate identity from ideas as you observe, but I also routinely see it when consulting with agency management and staff in my current role.
We're the guys ad agencies hire to come in and fix problems. Well, step one for us is identifying the challenges at hand. But, because of a history of watching agency presidents passionately start defending the very things they've hired us to come in and fix, we've developed a unique approach. We avoid talking about problems, and instead ask questions that engage everyone in open discussion. We question the status quo, but then let agency staff and management talk it through together with just enough guidance from us to make sure they get to the right solutions.
Inevitably, talking things through as a collaborative group disarms the negative DPA reaction. No one's turf or prior performance is threatened. It's all about the solution. And if we can get to real solutions by approaching challenges without indictment of individuals, why not? Does merely identifying or criticizing the creator of an operational problem or business growth shortcoming help you fix it any faster? No.
In fact, we've found involving the sources of problems in the solutions is both essential and immensely powerful. That's when DPA reactions become positive. You see relaxed deep breaths. Positive looks across the conference table between AE's and creatives. Agency presidents sit back, smile and later express a comfortable sense of ownership over a solution to such things as a broken new business process they created themselves...all because there was no focus on the past and everything was revealed in open, forward-focused discussion.
If you keep it positive, DPA reactions are your friend. Group revelation of positive outcomes suddenly produces a bonded team of people who feel good, respond to each other with enthusiasm, and invest themselves in new solutions even when they might have previously been sources of the problem.
DPA or conversion reactions can definitely be negative, and creating those situations should be avoided because of the powerful emotions unleashed. But the positive aspect of how our brains and bodies react is equally powerful. Using DPA reactions to positive advantage is a beautiful thing.
John, great comment. "But, because of a history of watching agency presidents passionately start defending the very things they've hired us to come in and fix, we've developed a unique approach. We avoid talking about problems, and instead ask questions that engage everyone in open discussion. We question the status quo, but then let agency staff and management talk it through together with just enough guidance from us to make sure they get to the right solutions."
This is the approach we use at Solution People in Chicago. We simply ask questions. Tom Monahan often says that creativity is the art of asking better questions. What I have consistently witness is even in the face of contrary evidence, people will hold fast to ideas they own or have invested in. In the traditional bureaucratic organization, the freedom to ask questions must be championed by the CEO or leader or it's an at risk profession. (Think ITT's Harold Geneen, Mike Eisner or Don Rumsfeld).
hi every person,
I identified creativitycentral.squarespace.com after previous months and I'm very excited much to commence participating. I are basically lurking for the last month but figured I would be joining and sign up.
I am from Spain so please forgave my speaking english...
you can consistently baddest Chanel as this is the best allowance you can anytime allowance your love. Though they are replicas, they attending actual agnate with the accurate ones. However, you will accept to allow Chanel Necklace of dollars to amuse your adult with artist Chanel Ring .